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The Star Wars Cantina
Sung to the tune of "Copacabana" by Barry Manilow
Written by Mark Jonathan Davis
© Copyright 1997 Mark Jonathan Davis / Earthquake Entertainment
Lyrics and Lead Vocal by Mark Jonathan Davis
Backup vocals by Loretta Mendoza

(Leia: "Help me Obi-Wan Kenobi, you're my only hope")
(Artoo: Beeps)

Her name was Leia, she was a princess,
with a danish on each ear, and Darth Vader (Vader: Breath sounds/Davis SFX) drawing near.
So Artoo Detoo, found Ben Kenobi. (Ben: "Obi-Wan")
He'd have to put the Death Star plans, into the Rebellion's hands.
So Luke and Obi-Wan, had to get to Alderaan,
so they stopped into Mos Eisley, to have a drink with Han...

chorus
At the Star Wars, [Star Wars!], Star Wars Cantina, [Star Wars Cantina]
The weirdest creatures you've ever seen-a!
[Here, at the] Star Wars, [Star!], {Star Wars Cantina,
Music, and blasters, and old Jedi Masters, at the Star Wars!...}

(Greedo: "Oota-do-ta, Solo?")
His name was Solo (Han: "Han Solo"), he was a pilot (Millenium Falcon flying by)
With a blaster at his side (Solo's blaster firing), and a smile twelve parsecs wide,
there with Chewbacca (Chewie: "Roar"), he was a Wookiee.
They met with Luke and Obi-Wan, about the Millenium Falcon.
Docking Bay Ninety-four (Ben: "Ninety-four"), Stormtroopers at the door. (Three knocks on metal)
With a flash of Ben's lightsaber (Saber igniting and swooping), now there's an arm, (Surly man: "Aaaargh!") on the floor...

chorus
At the Star Wars, [Star Wars!], Star Wars Cantina, [Star Wars Cantina]
The weirdest creatures you've ever seen-a!
[Here, at the] Star Wars, [Star!], {Star Wars Cantina,
Music, and blasters, and old Jedi Masters, at the Star Wars!...}

(Ben: "Mos Eisley Spaceport. You will never find a more wretched hive of scum and villainy. We must be cautious.")

His name was Yoda, he was a muppet. (Yoda: "EewOHew!", like Grover/Davis SFX)
Darth Vader was so bad, and by the way he's Luke's dad.
Luke kissed his sister (Leia kissing Luke/Davis SFX); his hand got cut off. (Saber Zap, Luke: "Aaaaagh!")
In that galaxy far, far away, Luke has had a lousy day.
Boba Fett was so mean, Jabba had bad hygiene. (Davis/Jabba: "Ho! Ho! Ho!")
Why didn't they all just relax, back on Tatooine...

chorus
At the Star Wars, [Star Wars!], Star Wars Cantina, [Star Wars Cantina]
The weirdest creatures you've ever seen-a! (Cantina Driod Alarm SFX)
[Here, at the] Star Wars, [Star!], {Star Wars Cantina,
Music, and blasters, and old Jedi Masters, at the Star Wars!...}

(Ben: "The Force will be with you, always")
[Star Wars, Star Wars Cantina,] (Artoo: Beeps and Whistles)
[Star Wars,] (Chewie: Growl) [Star Wars Cantina...]